This morning was a rather unusual morning for me. I got to sleep in. Thank God. I got to cook my daughters breakfast and get them ready for school. Always an adventure. I got to drop one daughter off for Chorus rehearsal and then rush back home to get the other daughter on the bus. Whew! We did it!
I love being a parent. And while I'm a parent daily--brush your teeth! take a bath! do your homework! don't eat that off the floor! cry on my shoulder; it's okay--I treasure the days where I get to do extra. Normally we have family who gets my children on the bus and to chorus rehearsal, but due to old age and surgeries (Ha! Sorry, Rob) and hectic schedules, I pitched in and decided to arrive at work a little later than usual. For my kids.
But something happened once they were gone. Something I don't usually get to enjoy. Like ever. I was alone. In my car! ALONE!
No children. No slugs (if you don't already know what that is, just go read my About Krystal page). No husband. No dog. I was gloriously alone.
I wanted to do All The Things you're supposed to do when alone in the car! Turn up the radio to its fullest level. Roll down the windows and let the wind take my hair. I decided against that one. I think the breeze would have frozen my hair and then broken it off. A girl can dream, though, right? I wanted to use my imaginary microphone and sing at the top of my lungs. Check.
Then something else happened. Pandora decided to play chill music--which I somehow found a way to sing to like my life depended on it, like Shelter by Ray LaMontagne--and force me inside myself.
So, now I was alone and reflective. And that made me silent. I stopped thinking about All The Things that usually run through my head--what needs to be done? when? will I make it? do I need help? did I set out the chicken for dinner?--and felt the emotions of the songs. I felt the rises and falls like they belonged to me. My imagination listened to the silence, told me to stay in it, to hold onto it, to embrace it. That I needed it!
And so I did. And I feel amazing for it. Refreshed. Excited.
For that hour it took me to drive to work ALONE in MUSIC-INDUCED SILENCE, I relaxed. No phones ringing. No kids crying. No things needing to be done other than focus on the road.
And now I want to write. I want to dream. I want to take on this world. And I want you to feel it too.
When's the last time you found your silence? Does music help you like it does me?